Short Reviews, Short Reviews, Does Whatever a Short Reviews Can

What do you do when you can’t think of a good topic with which to end the year? Read books and watch movies, of course! And then review them!

Wait, that’s not what you do. That’s what I do.

Unseen Academicals by Terry Pratchett (2009) – What have you done to me, Pratchett? I thought it was mainly the “And to summarize my life’s work…” tone of Nation that nearly brought me to tears by the end, but Unseen Academicals did, too. In the good way, mind – in the way that only the very best humour can, where everything makes you laugh but you still can’t help caring about the characters.

When the wizards of Unseen University (whom, by the way, I find ten times less perplexing and a billion times more hilarious since I’ve become a grad student) run into a spot of funding trouble, they find themselves organizing a new, rule-driven, formally refereed version of the violent, anarchic sport the lower classes play in the street. How their troubles intersect with those of Nutt, a strangely competent and oddly meek new university candle-dribbler; Glenda, the head of the Night Kitchen; Juliet, her beautiful best friend; and Trev Likely, another candle-dribbler from a family of skilled football players, waits to be discovered by those who pick up the book. Suffice it to say, the story’s exquistely crafted and skips between characters with all the deftness of, uh, something that’s really deft.

As always, Pratchett gives us the one bad guy who’s really bad, who  chooses again and again to hurt others for absolutely no reason save that he enjoys their suffering, and he fleshes out the rest of the antagonists with subtle motives, redeeming qualities, and human personalities. He also gives us the real-world version of the fairy-tale ending without being bitter or judgemental toward those who were born lucky enough to live happily ever after.

The Princess and the Frog (2009) – Surprisingly, The Princess and the Frog manages to do the same thing.

When I first heard about this movie a year or two ago, I was skeptical. Disney has a recent habit of pretending to “correct” the saccharine-sweetness and candy-coated sexism and racism for which its studio is infamous, but until now, its efforts left me underwhelmed. Movies like Enchanted superficially seemed to be about subverting the genre but instead just trotted out all the familiar Disney morals for yet another curtain call. So imagine my surprise when I discovered that The Princess and the Frog is the real deal.

Sure, there are some uncomfortable aspects – the insensitivity toward real practitioners of voodoo comes to mind – but on the whole, the movie gives the impression that the artists involved genuinely thought carefully about what message each aspect of their film would send and modified their work accordingly, even if sometimes they fell short of the mark.

How can I count the ways? Realistically flawed prince (a philanderer!!!) who comes to realize the error of his ways. Princess who gets where she wants to be by hard work and initiative and has to learn that it’s still OK to dream while you’re working toward your goals. Villainous imagery that doesn’t hold back from scaring the kids. Multi-faceted supporting characters – comic relief who changes from a walking running gag to one of the most engaging characters in the whole film and a vapid “wicked stepsister”-type who nevertheless turns out to be a true friend when it counts. Mature yet appropriate discussion of death.  In fact, the tone of this movie is so fresh for Disney that – well, I don’t want to spoil what happens, but, if this were The Little Mermaid, there would be a point where all bets are off, and you really, truly aren’t sure whether Ariel is going to get her retconned fairytale ending or accept the fact that she’s a mermaid, not a human, and learn to be happy under the sea.

But it’s still Disney. There are still G-rated gags, tons of gorgeously animated musical numbers, a thumping jazz soundtrack from Randy Newman, and a reasonably upbeat ending. There’s a fairy-tale romance that culminates in a marriage and a bunch of quirky characters. There’s everything that appealed about Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, and The Lion King, except there’s so much more, too.

Carpe Demon: Adventures of a Demon-Hunting Soccer Mom by Julie Kenner (2006) – Apparently, this is the first in a series, which I just learned from googling the title to find the name of the author.  Kate, the protagonist, is an ex-demon hunter… and also a stay-at-home wife to a local would-be politician and mom to a preteen and a toddler. Naturally, by the end of the first chapter, the “ex” part of “ex-demon hunter” is no longer true, and both hilarity and hellfire ensue.

I enjoyed Carpe Demon, although a cursory look over the various reviews on Amazon tell me that I might be missing even more of the hilarity by not being familiar with the trope this series is sending up – I’ve never seen a single episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer or similar shows. So caveat lector. Kate’s likable, and I’m sure that if I had kids or a spouse, I’d find her even more relatable. Again, not being familiar with Buffy and the Buffy-esque, I was never quite sure how seriously to be taking these demons – on one hand, they kill people, but on the other, I’m supposed to believe there’s a very good reason for keeping all this crazy stuff secret from one’s husband, karate instructor, etc.

Conclusion: I’ll pick up a sequel or two, if I see them, but since my tastes run a little differently, I probably won’t go looking for them.

Edward Scissorhands (1990) – I know, I know, given my age and where I live, this film should have been a formative part of my childhood. But it wasn’t. And maybe that’s why I was underwhelmed by it. Don’t get me wrong – I love me some Tim Burton visuals, and this movie didn’t disappoint, but compared to his later work, this one seemed so… unfinished. Like, if all his other movies were people he built from scratch, this one really does still have scissors for hands. The story of Edward, a young man who, uh, has scissors for hands because the crazy inventor who built him died before he could finish him, and his introduction into a pastel-perfect suburban neighbourhood is a fun fable, but there’s something about the execution that just feels… off.  There are a lot of great ideas crammed into one short movie, but they all feel rough and rushed, without any of the texture and subtlety I’ve come to expect from Burton.

Ponyo on the Cliff by the Sea (2008) – If Disney’s Ariel with her selfishness and instant!true!love annoys you, try this alternate alternate take (since The Little Mermaid was itself an alternate take on Hans Christian Andersen’s version). It’s not as complex or nuanced as some of Studio Ghibli’s other offerings, but it has Miyazaki’s trademark lack-of-OMGebil!!!-villains, and the five-year-olds it portrays are adorably realistic without being boring.

The goldfish Brunhilda is one of the daughters of Fujimoto, the king of the sea. When Brunhilda gets stuck in a jar, Sosuke, a five-year-old boy, rescues her and re-names her “Ponyo”. Ponyo and Sosuke’s bond of friendship is so strong that Ponyo uses her father’s magic to become human to be with him, and, in doing so, she unbalances the natural order of the world.

The story is slow-paced and gentle, and the plot is relatively straightforward. All the characters are nuanced, and no one is irredeemably horrible. In fact, the meanest character is a little old lady from the nursing home where Sosuke’s mother works, and even she has Sosuke’s best interests at heart. It’s unfair to compare it to Studio Ghibli works aimed at an older audience, but if you go in expecting Spirited Away, Princess Mononoke, or Castle in the Sky, you’ll be disappointed, because the world here feels distinctly smaller and simpler. This isn’t an epic struggle between various parties, it’s the story of the sweet friendship between two little kids.

Franklyn (2008) – “WTF?” is what you may be thinking from the moment you pop this DVD into your player. What looks from the cover like some sort of dystopian sci-fi fantasy turns out to be the interwoven stories of three real-world characters going about their variously troubled lives in present-day London and one Rorschach-like vigilante atheist who lives in the fantasy “Meanwhile City”, where everyone else has some sort of wacky faith. The film doesn’t even gently segue between the two: cut cut, and we’re suddenly transported from London to magic land without any thematic or plot connection.

Stick with it, and you’ll find it all makes sense in the end. However, your patience may run out long before then. In any case,  if you’re picking this up because you’re a fantasy fan, don’t. Although this movie seem to have all the trappings of a fantasy, it’s really quite the opposite: a cunningly reasoned argument against preferring imagination to reality. By the end, you’ll be disappointed that the interesting plots have all given way to the boring ones. In some ways, this movie is a lot like Donnie Darko or Pi, where there’s a lot going on and you just have to hold out for the payoff. Trouble is, both those other films have a better payoff than this one.

See you in 2010! Happy New Year!